My Secret Identity Revealed

Why I have a covert coffee name.

Audio narration by David Marlow

Reimagined artwork by David Marlow from an original photo by No Revisions

It was $10 Tuesday, and the store was packed with people waiting to pick up their orders. Save for the young people making the pizzas, it was a rare occasion when I was the youngest person in the room.

“Pizza for Dave,” yelled the kid behind the counter.

Five white-haired men stood up and went for the pizza, including me, until I recalled that my wife had ordered it in her name.

One Dave grabbed his pizza. Three Daves sat down, disappointed their time had not yet come.

At one time, my first name was the top name given to boys in America. It had been in the top 10 for decades.

This year, it is not even in the top 100; times change.

So when I order at a coffee shop, I use a code name because, as with the pizza, several Daves or Davids are often picking up a drink.

I've had as many as four other men about my age grab for my drink simultaneously. I first encountered this when my wife was working as a Barista. It just so happened one of her coworkers had a baby boy and named him Sevrin.

I decided that was a cool name and would become my secret coffee identity. At first, it was to ensure I got my drink.

Over time, it has become more.

Baristas often comment on the name, saying it is cool or asking about the origin. I've developed an entire backstory to the name, country of origin, how I got it, and how cool it is to have.

You should see the faces of friends who get coffee with me for the first time. It's fun and allows me to 'be' someone else. It got me thinking, how often are we someone else?

Most of my family and friends from school call me David. Everyone else refers to me as Dave.

I’m fine either way. Dave is an easy name to say. I never use it myself in anything official, though on rare occasions do when referring to myself in a story.

Which is where it has gotten weird in the past week.

Since posting the story ‘The Mind of Dave’ last week, I’m getting ‘Dave’ stuff wherever I go on social media.

The next day, this ad for a hat popped up. I mean, who would want a hat that says…

What a Difference a Dave Makes?

Do they have specific sayings for lots of names? Do they only specialize in Dave?

Then, this Dave coffee combo.

Dave’s Coffee is a real coffee roaster. I actually dig the mug and might get one.

I’ve never had anything show up for Sevrin, however.

Maybe there are too many Dave’s? Dr. Suess seemed to think so. Here is his version of…

Too Many Daves¹

Did I ever tell you that Mrs. McCave
Had twenty-three sons and she named them all Dave?
Well, she did.  And that wasn't a smart thing to do.
You see, when she wants one and calls out, "Yoo-Hoo!
Come into the house, Dave!" she doesn't get one.
All twenty-three Daves of hers come on the run!
This makes things quite difficult at the McCaves'
As you can imagine, with so many Daves.
And often she wishes that, when they were born,
She had named one of them Bodkin Van Horn
And one of them Hoos-Foos.  And one of them Snimm.
And one of them Hot-Shot.  And one Sunny Jim.
And one of them Shadrack.  And one of them Blinkey.
And one of them Stuffy.  And one of them Stinkey.
Another one Putt-Putt.  Another one Moon Face.
Another one Marvin O'Gravel Balloon Face.
And one of them Ziggy.  And one Soggy Muff.
One Buffalo Bill.  And one Biffalo Buff.
And one of them Sneepy.  And one Weepy Weed.
And one Paris Garters.  And one Harris Tweed.
And one of them Sir Michael Carmichael Zutt
And one of them Oliver Boliver Butt
And one of them Zanzibar Buck-Buck McFate ...
But she didn't do it.  And now it's too late.

Can there be too many Dave’s?

While I'm still searching for the answer to that question, it's clear that our identities are more fluid than we often think.

They are one of many ways we present ourselves to the world, even if it's through a playful coffee shop variation.

I’m grateful my parents didn’t name me Oliver Boliver Butt. That’s the grandkid’s favorite one when I read the poem to them.

I wonder what my new grandson’s name will be. I’m fairly certain it won’t be Sevrin…or David.

You can learn more about Ikiquest+ here.

For Plus subscribers, you can access your Ikiquest+ resources here.

Need help creating your Ikiverse? Explore 1-on-1 coaching here.

1. From "The Sneetches and Other Stories" (New York: Random House, 1961). © by owner. Provided at no charge for educational purposes