Marlow's Musings 10/01/23

Insights, adventures and fun stuff from this week.

Audio narration by David Marlow

Reimagined artwork by and from an original photo by David Marlow ©2023

Coffee

Today is International Coffee Day. Who decides such things? Is there a governing body at the UN who, in a formal ceremony in New York, names days?

There is also International Donut Day, though, that is in June. Appealing to synergy, they should be on the same day or at least on concurrent days.

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A man of his time, my late father drank his coffee black. The Navy was where he learned to smoke cigarettes and drink black coffee. Sugar was scarce on submarines during World War II, though cigarettes weren’t.

He gave up cigarettes cold turkey because the smoke left yellowing stains on the windows of his new car. Drinking black coffee stayed with him.

My dad, in a powder blue tux, holding a cigarette on or about 1955.

His coffee always came in a can and was the cheapest he could find. Living through the Depression was buried deep in his bones. I brought him some Starbucks coffee once to try. He thanked me and brewed a pot.

“I don’t think my tastebuds can appreciate good coffee.”

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The pot gurgled and spluttered. Even though the coffee was awful, it was coffee, and I needed some.

Whatever we didn’t drink that morning would be left on the burner all day in case he wanted some later. By then, the consistency more closely resembled something you’d use to repair a road than arabica beans.

My oldest sister Linda was making a rare trip to Illinois from Arizona, and I drove down from Wisconsin to join my dad in picking her up at the airport in St. Louis.

The terminal was Minoru Yamasaki's architectural wonder, though I hardly noticed.

My head was pounding. What started as a small bit of discomfort on the drive had escalated to a full marching band percussion practice session.

Lambert International Airport, St. Louis, MO

Linda arrived, and we stopped for lunch on the way home. A greasy cheeseburger and fountain Coke, the kind that bubbles so much it almost burns going down. The soda helped. Now, it was only a base drum practicing in my skull.

The Flatlands, as we call them in Wisconsin, was where my dad had spent most of his life. The Illinois prairie is flat with a 180°view of the horizon. Most wouldn’t describe it as beautiful, though they’ve probably never watched the sunset over the cornfields.

My dad in his garden harvesting corn for dinner.

As evening came, we watched the golden sun say goodnight and enjoyed an all-too-rare conversation.

My stepmother Bernice interrupted. “Linda, I want you to know I made sure to have your special coffee.”

“Special coffee, what’s that?” I asked, thinking maybe it was a flavor or brand that she liked.

“Just decaf, I can’t drink caffeinated coffee anymore,” Linda answered.

“That’s what you and Tom (my dad) had this morning,” Bernice chimed in.

Now my head hurt even worse.

Word of the Week

Sonder

Sonder: (n)

sönder

1: The realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own—populated with their own ambitions, friends, routines, worries and inherited craziness—an epic story that continues invisibly around you like an anthill sprawling deep underground, with elaborate passageways to thousands of other lives that you’ll never know existed, in which you might appear only once, as an extra sipping coffee in the background, as a blur of traffic passing on the highway, as a lighted window at dusk.

Sonder is a neologism or a newly coined word. You may be thinking, ‘Wait, you mean sonder wasn’t already a word?’

I assumed it was. In researching it, I found out it isn’t in any regular dictionary. Sonder does exist in German, meaning ‘special’ and in French, where it means ‘to probe’.

Jon Koenig coined the English meaning in his book Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows.

In case you missed it…

On LinkedIn, ☕️ I celebrating National Coffee Day in the US with a bit of silliness around the concept of ‘Medical Grade Coffee.’

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🌀 I also changed the 10 Rules of Ikigai…Well, one of them.

Ikigai is about experiencing your essence (who) and purpose (why) in harmony with whatever you do (what).

The 10 Rules of Ikigai are great for helping live Ikigai.

❓Rule number 5-Get in shape for your next birthday-was becoming a hang-up for many people.

This wording prompted many questions, including…

📌 What if my birthday is next week?
📌 What if I've tried to get in shape before and couldn't?
📌 What does getting into shape have to do with my purpose?
📌 What about other areas of my life?

🌱 This rule aims to spark continuous improvement and growth each year of your life. The idea is to stay in shape physically, mentally and spiritually, supporting being active and part of life.

💥 So I’m changing the rules!

Rule number 5 is now...

Check out the new rule in The Ten Rules of Ikiagi.

Ikiquest+

This week in Ikiquest+…I shared the concept of ‘blessing’ and the text of one on courage from John O’Donohue.

Plus, subscribers can check it out here.

Of Courage and Coffee

Quote I’m Pondering

This from author Andy Stanley in his book Visioneering.

What is a vision? Where do they come from?

Visions are born in the soul of a man or woman who is consumed with the tension between what is and what could be…Visions form in the hearts of those who are dissatisfied with the status quo.

Vision often begins with the inability to accept things the way they are. Over time, that dissatisfaction matures into a clear picture of what could be. But a vision is more than that. After all, what could be is an idea, a dream, but not necessarily a vision.

There is always a moral element to vision. Vision carries with it a sense of conviction. Anyone with a vision will tell you this is not merely something that could be done. This is something that should be done. This is something that must happen.

Comment of the Week:

The comment of the week comes from April from the post Even Stone

Even Stone

David, you always get me thinking. Today, I'm realizing that most people see a stone and think, "That obstacle is way too big and heavy ever to be moved..."

Yet completely overlook how that small, consistent motion of the water drop not only "moves" it out of the way...it completely changes it over time.

We can do that with our goals as well...no matter HOW big they are.

Fun Thing I Saw This Week

In my Words of Purpose posts, I try to find unique and interesting words to investigate. This week I found something that will make saying those interesting words easier.

With mild dyslexia, pronouncing words becomes easier for me if I can hear them.

Check out, Forvo – a website capable of pronouncing words in Romance languages, German, Russian, and Japanese.

It is even helpful in proper English pronunciation when needed.

Final Thoughts

The outragists are at it again. For what seems like the hundredth time though it might only be the fourth in two years, the world is coming to an end because the US government might shut down.

Not taking sides here. This isn’t a political point. The news media has stirred up fears that calamity will happen if the two major parties in Congress can’t agree on a budget resolution.

They want you worried and stirred up…and to watch their newscasts with rapt attention.

The parties love this process too because they can fundraise off of how ‘The (insert other party name here) want to (insert egregious thing they want to do) and I need your help to stop them.’

Both parties do this. It is all about bargaining and fundraising and has zero to do with the people they were elected to represent.

If you are worried by these events, my encouragement to you is to relax. Nothing has happened, and nothing will happen. You can quote me on that.

It’s all Kabuki Theater¹ playing into the world of outragism.

Refuse to play.

🌀Quest well

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1. Kabuki is a form of classical theater in Japan known for its elaborate costumes and dynamic acting. The phrases Kabuki theater, kabuki dance, or kabuki play are sometimes used in political discourse to describe an event characterized more by showmanship than by content.